Monday, August 30, 2010

Why can't we be friends?

Fun fact about Meaghan #204! I love to read! Especially when its a good book, a good story or when it teaches you something. I just finished reading Ender's Game which was a pretty sweet book about this kid who fights aliens and saves the world! haha for reals. but its good. Not as good as Hunger Games, where all the kids are forced to kill each other cause the government is so corrupt, but pretty sweet nonetheless. And now I'm reading a book I found in my new place (I may or may not have stolen it from one of my roommates) called "The Art of Seduction" sounds kinky huh? Haha ;) its actually super interesting! I'm learning a lot! But more on that later. When I was reading Ender's Game at my super boring job, I came across this...

"In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him. I think it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves."

When you first meet someone you obviously have absolutely no mental connection to the person, no opinion formed of them. (unless of course you've heard about them or have a mutual friend, but we're talking about meeting them for the first time ever) You don't know their likes or dislikes their hopes or dreams or fears or frustrations. What experiences shaped them and what ones made them see life the way they do. That person really is nothing to you, they may walk away and you may never see them again. They are known to you as nothing more than that guy or that girl, a stranger. Often a first impression of a that person will make you judge them, and most times very harshly. I think we all have the tendency to judge people based on their appearance, and feelings of resentment, jealousy, disgust or indifference may lead you to assume something about that person that isn't true. I know I'm guilty of that! But thats really all it is, is assumption. Its not until you spend time with the person, or have some sort of interaction with them (hopefully on more than one occasion) that you really develop an opinion of them.
Not everyone in the world likes everyone they meet. Some people hate others purely on principle (which is ridiculous) some people dislike people that don't know how to drive ( :P ) or who smell bad or who are prettier than them or richer... some may not like each other because of a misunderstanding or something said by another while in a bad mood....
Something that always has been crazy to me that has always really frustrated me; how can I like someone, be in love with them, or best friends or good friends or just friendly acquaintances, and then someone else out there completely despises the same person I think so highly of! Is it all circumstantial? It's so sad!
Thats where this part of Ender's game comes in, "Its impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, (and I'll add, their hopes and desires, likes and dislikes, their good and bad experiences and how those shaped them) and not love them the way they love themselves". Now you may be thinking, "uh Meaghan, it is indeed possible, some people are just mean, some people call me ugly and take my shoelaces!" That isn't the type of love i'm talking about. If you really take the time to get to know people, understand what makes them tick, why they have the views and opinions they have, you will eventually love them, and maybe not like, but love the person they are. The kid in this book definitely didn't love the "enemies" he was talking about but I think he is referring more to a sense of understanding that makes you appreciate the person for who they are. An understanding of why they act the way they do.
Moral of the story, and a reiteration of my biggest pet peeve that a person can possibly have: Don't judge other people. You can't possibly know the things they are going through or went through that make them act the way the do, and if you truly did know, or took the time to try and understand them, chances are you would like them, quite possibly want them as a friend, you may even love them!
This all may sound really cheesy but its something I think about ALL the time!!

"Why can't we all just get along?"

"Why can't we be friends?" :)

I wish that I had time and the ability to get to know everyone in the world! I'm not joking! And it breaks my heart that the people that I do know, and get to know and have loved aren't always going to be a part of my life. I've said it before, I wish that everyone that I have liked and loved can be a part of my life forever. Cause obviously there was a reason I loved that person. And if we all weren't so caught up in our own lives and our own selfish ways of thinking we would never just start hating someone or not want them to be around anymore. If you really think about it, it only makes sense. How can you just stop loving someone? Is it really love then? And if it is, how depressing!

In my heaven I will be able to get to know everyone, their entire life story, and more than that, I will get to stay in contact with them, be with them forever.

No comments:

Post a Comment